Your relationship with yourself

The relationship you have with yourself is the most important one you will ever have.

Yet it's often the one that gets the least of our attention. We don't always cheer ourselves on and we don't listen to what our thoughts, feelings and emotions are telling us. We brush them aside, and only listen to the old stories and limiting talk of our thoughts, and it's these negative thoughts that we live our lives by. Or we use them as a stick to beat ourselves with.

We also allow others to tell us how our story should look.

And all of these things hold us back from trusting ourselves. They hold us back because we go round the same story loop that stops us from doing the things that we want to do. These stories affect our view of ourselves. And we cannot move forward and do the things that we want to do if we carry on aligning where we are now with what has gone before. Because it has a knock on effect on the relationship we have with ourselves.

When we do the work on ourselves, everything else follows. Otherwise we drag everything around with us wherever we go. And across the different areas of our lives.

This includes the way we talk to ourselves. Our self talk can be our harshest critic. It’s also the hardest thing to move away from because it’s the voice that we are used to listening to.

And we may find :

  • that we cannot do things without the approval of others

  • that it doesn't matter what we do, we keep getting the same result

  • that the same things keep happening to us in some relationships

  • that we naturally serve others and put ourselves last

  • that we feel stuck in the same place we were this time last month, last year ....

  • that we try to brush our thoughts under the carpet

  • that we criticise ourselves for feeling the way we do

  • that we stop allowing ourselves to do the things that make our heart sing

So if any of this sounds like you, then it may just be time to start working on your relationship with yourself. This is where I can help you and I shall be covering all of these things in my forthcoming 'Be Your Own Cheerleader' Group Programme.

You may have seen through my Red Carpet series, that I am an advocate for being honest with ourselves and embracing all of our thoughts, feelings and emotions. Thoughts, feelings and emotions are just that. And they are all worthy of our attention. Once we remove the negative and positive labels, we start to realise that there is much to be learned from our feelings when we look at them through a neutral lens. And that is the place where change takes place.

As a Coach, I am very good at getting to the root of the things that keeps us stuck. I've done the work on myself too and I know what it looks like. I also know that once we start to do the work, there are far more empowering alternatives. And it's these alternatives, and changing the way that we think, that gets us moving away from what we don't want. And this all happens when we choose ourselves.

The Be Your Own Cheerleader Programme

The Be Your Own Cheerleader Programme is all about supporting you to dedicate some of your lovely goodness to yourself. Just you. It's about doing the work on yourself that you may often look to the outside world to fix. It's also about being really honest with yourself about what you want and need. And accepting yourself for who you are and loving that person as hard as you love others. Most importantly, it's about starting to get comfortable with all of your thoughts, feelings and emotions and changing the way you perceive them.

I am going to be running this online group Coaching Programme for women that want to start to get to know, and really like themselves. Women that want to start cheering for themselves from their own corner. It’s short and sweet and it will cover all of the things I have mentioned above.

The programme will be starting on Monday 21 September for 5 days. There will be an early bird price available to those that book and pay before 3rd September. I require a minimum number of participants for the programme to work effectively and, more importantly - the numbers will be capped so that everyone gets an opportunity to be heard. Being listened to is often a rare commodity and I want to make sure that this happens.

So, if you want to start improving the relationship you have with yourself, and would like to be the first to be notified when the doors open for this programme, please contact me here with the message 'I'm choosing me and I want to be the first to hear'.

My name is Nicky Kentisbeer and I am a Mindset & Confidence Coach. I support women to work on their mindset and develop the confidence that they need to move beyond the challenges that are keeping them stuck, towards a place that they would much rather be. I do this based on the belief that we have within us the most incredible resources and capabilities to find our own solutions - irrespective of our background or starting point. There is no barrier to entry.

Maybe you have a feeling of being stuck, going round in circles or living the same day over and over? Or, are you finding that the way you approach problems and challenges always gives you the same result? And it’s not the one that you want. The feeling of being stuck is incredibly disempowering because it brings about feelings of indecision, procrastination, overthinking and fear which in turn can affect our self-belief and confidence. And if you stop to think about it, you may find that you fear success as much as you do failure. Sometimes staying stuck may feel like a safer place to be when the alternative means change and stepping outside of your comfort zone? There is nothing unusual here as we do all have a tendency to stand in our own way at times. This may happen because you have lost sight of how resourceful you are. You may also allow old beliefs and stories to inform your response to what is going on for you currently. Yet, much of this narrative is historical and it is no longer relevant to your life now and the choices that you make. As your coach, I can support you to understand and address the things that may be holding you back from achieving your goals. Through 1-to-1 coaching sessions, we will explore what it is that you want and the steps that you need to take to get started. I will ask lots of questions! Questions that you may not have asked of yourself. It is through these questions that I invite you to look at things in different ways, from a different perspective and access your own solutions accordingly. I will invite you to look at old beliefs and the stories that you may be telling yourself about your abilities. I do not teach nor tell you how things should be done. And there is no judgement. If this resonates with you, I invite you to book a free 30-minute call with me to discuss whether coaching would be the right approach for you to start turning your ideas and aspirations into action.

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©2019 by Nicky Kentisbeer